Evicted
by imaginationtrain
Summary: When a certain sexy vampire invades the tree house, steeling Cake with his good looks and kicking out Fionna, the human will have no choice but to fight back, with help from Prince Gumball.


**I do not own Adventure Time. ****Enjoy!**

Evicted

By imaginationtrain (with help from Cam)

"And then, the smokin' hot vampire sparkled in the sun. With the heroine on his back, he climbed right up the tree. And they were all smoochin' and huggin' and tellin' jokes," Cake said, eyes sparkling with intrigue. She and Fionna were in their rooms, telling stories, with Fionna curled up in her sleeping bag and Cake rolling around on the bed.

"That didn't happen," Fionna stated, trying her best to convince herself that the story wasn't true. "Why would he sparkle?"

"Oh, it happened," Cake insisted, ignoring the question. "In fact, I think they kissed in this very tree! I heard it from a friend who heard it from her cousin who happened to be there. He says the vampire was right _here_." Cake nodded eagerly, pointing to the ground with vigor.

"No way, you're making it up," Fionna giggled nervously. "Now get out of here! You're freaking me out."

Cake only laughed and proceeded to make kissing noises on her way down the ladder.

Fionna lay in her bed thinking. _If this story is true_, she thought,_ what if the creepy vampire comes back?_ _Oh glob. I'll just have to beat him up. No big deal, Fionna._ Now satisfied, she returned from the metaphorical astral plane, the aromatic smell of tea filling her nose. She jumped out of bed, excitedly awaiting the delicious hazelnut drink.

When she reached the kitchen, she was greeted with nothing but a kettle cooking on the stove. "Cake? Cake!" Fionna shouted, searching for her absent friend. Grabbing her sword, she ran haphazardly through the tree house, tossing aside any and every obstacle obstructing her path. The only noise to be heard was the rain on the roof and of course her own frantic footsteps.

She returned to the kitchen, panting heavily, mind racing. Where had the cat gone? Fionna spun to check outside, but realized something with a quick intake of breath. Slowly turning around, her suspicions were confirmed. Somebody, a somebody with dripping black hair, seductively teasing eyes, and- it couldn't be, could it?- fangs, had settled himself on their couch.

"Hey," he said, a surprisingly calm introduction for an intruder caught in the act.

Unfazed by his uncaring demeanor, Fionna pointed her sword at him. "What are you doing here, you creep? Who the heck do you think you are? Where's Cake?" The bombardment of questions flooded out of her mouth in outraged anger.

"Don't worry, Kitty's fine. I'm Marshall Lee, the Vampire King."

"Where's Cake?" Fionna repeated angrily, bringing up her sword to swing.

The stranger in front of her only chuckled, and this was more than a little unsettling. Fionna, unwilling to deal with this, brought her sword down hard, landing a good hit across his arm.

Marshall hissed, grabbing his forearm in an attempt to stop the blood. "Geez, I have her here. She just passed out on me, started freaking out. "‛He's real,' she kept muttering. I just took her with me. Didn't want her to get wet-" He gestured with his free hand, waving at the open window, "-out there." The vampire uncurled his hand, revealing a tiny Cake who was indeed unconscious.

Fionna rushed over, yanking her from his cold, wet hand. She tucked little Cake under her hat protectively. "Why are you here?" She asked.

Marshall sighed. Lifting his hand in a lazy manor, he flipped it up. Across the room, a picture flipped up, revealing a big, messy _M._ "This is my place." Fionna slowly took it in. _If Marshal is here because this was his house, he probably wants to take it from us_, Fionna thought. She felt Cake moving under her hat, and brought her out to the open world.

"So you want it back now?" Fionna asked accusingly, as Cake woke and stretched back into her normal size. "No way, dude. Get out!"

"Uh, no," Marshall said, venom seeping through his words. "As much as I want to hang out with a spazy kitty and a violent human, you two should probably leave instead."

"Leave? Its on, Vamp!" Fionna spat, once again bringing her sword to an attacking position. Marshall got up as well, ready for a fight he was sure to win.

"Wait wait, Fionna!" Cake yelled from where she had been watching. "You can't fight him, he's gorgeous!" Her eyes were wide and sparkling, and it caused Marshall to laugh.

"Cake, is it?" He asked. "You seem pretty cool. Do you want to stay here with me?" His slide his eyes over to Fionna pridefully, and then he took his gaze back to Cake, who was nodding her head painfully hard. Marshall was smart: he knew the best places to attack.

"Cake! What are you doing?" Fionna screamed, unbelieving of the situation.

"Relax, honey. You can just stay at Gumballs place," Cake stated, already walking towards the Vampire. Marshall fidgeted.

"You know Gumball?" He said quietly.

"Yah, what of it?" Fionna said, slightly taken aback by his sudden change in tone.

"Get out," Marshall commanded.

"I already told you, I'm not-," Fionna attempted, but was cut off when Marshall Lee picked her up, and threw her out the door. Fionna hit the muddy ground with a _thud_, the rain soaking her clothes immediately.

"HEY! Don't you hurt her," Caked screamed, but Marshall countered by flipping his hair and looking forlorn, and Cake quieted in amazement.

"Why don't you go to your boyfriend?" Marshall yelled out the window, and then slammed the panels shut. Fionna stared in surprise.

"I don't have anywhere else to stay," She mumbled to herself, and started on the long, lonely path to the Candy Kingdom.

**A/N: Hoped you enjoyed! Ill update soon, too. Also, did you guys get my Twilight reference in the beginning? How the sparkiling vampire climbed up a tree...? No? Oh well. And I know Cake seems terrible. Ill try to fix it in further chapters, but I don't know if I can. Ill try anyways though! Bye Bye! Thanks for reading! **


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